While I have been a huge fan of the TV series, “Being Mary Jane,” almost 48-hours later I still find myself struggling with her “It’s okay to be #2” speech to a group of high school girls. While I understand this show is aimed at capturing the reality of black single women, has our opportunities for a healthy, viable, loving, (and because we are discussing the context of the show, not for debate) and heterosexual relationship become so hopeless where NUMBER TWO is the best my sisters can aspire to reach. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, there are 100 Black women, for every 87 Black men. By the time we rule out those impacted by the prison industrial complex, those who are homosexual, and those who prefer to date any other woman BUT a sistah, then the chances of being NUMBER ONE, may look a little bleak. But remember what the prophet Jeremiah says: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29: 11, NIV) God’s plan to prosper you, give you peace, completeness, and safety, does not include fights with your married lover regarding whether or not he is sleeping in the same bed with his wife or the ignored text messages reminding you of your second place status. God’s plan to give you hope should not be lost in the self-deception of “perks without the work” that being NUMBER TWO necessitates. And God’s plan to give you a secure future, includes you not worrying about when you reap the seeds of adultery that were once sown and your place of the mistress turns to the forgotten SECOND wife. My sistahs, no matter what Mary Jane says on television, life is not a BET Drama Series. NUMBER TWO will NEVER get the same notoriety or respect as NUMBER ONE. God’s design and plans for you are better than the second slot. Don’t settle for NUMBER TWO, when you were created to be NUMBER ONE. In the same vein as the 1990 drug commercials, no one ever grows up and says I want to be someone’s second choice! Aim higher, God’s plans for you do!
